Changing Light Bulbs

How many choir members does it take to change a light bulb?

Charismatics: Only one.  Hands already in the air.

Roman Catholics: None.  They use candles.

Pentecostals: Ten.  One to change the bulb, and nine to
pray against the spirit of darkness.

Presbyterians: None.  God has predestined when the lights
will be on and off.

Episcopalians: Eight.  One to call the electrician, and
seven to say how much they liked the old one better.

Mormons: Five.  One man to change the bulb, and four wives
to tell him how to do it.

Unitarians: "We choose not to make a statement either in
favor of or against the need for a light bulb.  However, if
in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work
for you, that is fine.  You are invited to write a poem or
compose a modern dance about your personal relationship
with your light bulb, and present it next month at our
annual light bulb Sunday service, in which we will explore
a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent,
fluorescent, three-way, long-life and tinted, all of which
are equally valid paths to luminescence."

Baptists: At least 15.  One to change the light bulb, and
two or three committees to approve the change.  Oh, and
also one to provide a casserole.

Methodists: (see Baptists)

Lutherans: None.  Lutherans don't believe in change