Thursday, July 31, 2008

It's me again....

What have I been doing? Just enjoying my summer at stately Bombay Manor, soaking up the sun poolside, drinking to excess and supervising the landscaping crew. It's composed mostly of illegal immigrants from Canada. They try to mow the lawn with a snow blower. 'Sup with that? Damned Canadians.

Anyhoo, I've also been navigating the fever swamps of Traddyism on the internet. Wow, there's some real wack jobs out there, God bless their souls. Such adventures have inspired me to compose a parody song. It's sung to the tune of Alanis Morrisette's Ironic. If you don't know that one, look it up on YouTube. I can't be expected to do everything for you, now can I? And, if you understand all the references, you might be a real Traddy. (There's probably another parody in there somewhere.)

SSPX or SSPV
Sedes of all types and other indys
The new Mass is a sacrilegious show
I can prove it…the Dimond Bros. told me so
And isn't it ironic... don't you think

It’s a Ball of Redemption that ruins your day
It’s a World Consecration, that didn’t go all the way
A Third Secret revealed but still hidden away
Who would've thought... it figures

Common error or supplied jurisdiction
We put all our faith in such theological fiction
It’s a tinfoil biretta guarding against conspiracy
It’s obeying trad priests, but not the Holy See
And isn't it ironic... don't you think

It’s a Ball of Redemption that ruins your day
It’s a World Consecration, that didn’t go all the way
A Third Secret revealed but still hidden away
Who would've thought... it figures

Well Truth has a funny way of sneaking up on you
When you think everything's okay and the Pope’s in Kansas
And Truth has a funny way of helping you out when
You think everything's gone wrong and the Chair is really vacant

Communism falls when the consecration didn’t take
The Novus Ordo Mass still dispenses grace
It’s like ten thousand seers when all you need is Tradition
It’s no salvation…without my permission
And isn't it ironic...don't you think
A little too ironic...yeah, I really do think...

It’s a Ball of Redemption that ruins your day
It’s a World Consecration, that didn’t go all the way
A Third Secret revealed but still hidden away
Who would've thought... it figures

Truth has a funny way of sneaking up on you
Truth has a funny, funny way of helping you out
Helping you out

5 comments:

Tom in Vegas said...

I don't like Alanis Morrisette, despite the fact that somehow one of her albums made it into my CD collection.

Anyway, a few nights ago I had a dream that I was walking in a mall here in Vegas, when I noticed Alanis was walking in towards me. I did not want to talk to her (to me she's always had a horse face) and thought I was doomed. Luckily the benches for public seating were made of haystacks and I quickly grabbed a stack and through it directly in front of her. She began to munch on it while I quickly sped away.

Let me clarify a couple of points. Number one; I don’t like Alanis not because of her horse face but because some of the things she has said about the Catholic Church. And number two; I like horses and their horse faces. Horses are cool, Alanis is not.

Marilena said...

lol doc!!!! your truly a riot! snowblowers as a lawnmowers? haw haw haw haw!!! :)

paramedicgirl said...

Hey Dr. B! Welcome back to the blog! You do know you shouldn't harbour those illegal Canadians, don't you? And definitely don't let them get ahold of your Protestant whiskey. You never know what your lawn will look like then.

ignorant redneck said...

The song: one word--groovey!

allanis morrisette--no opinion

illegal canadians? Gee, that would be something different here--how would we distinguish their neighborhoods?

And NOBODY TOUCHES MY WHISKY!

Shirley said...

Dr. B, watch whatya say 'bout us Canadians or I'll sic my team of huskies on ya and lock you in my igloo!