back from the dead

How appropriate that on the day after America elects a jack-booted communard to the highest office in the land, I should crawl from my mouldering grave. There's irony there somewhere. Or a fortunate happenstance. Here's some post-election analysis like you can't find anywhere else. Nor would you want to.

We should all thank Arizona's Senator Planters (as in nuttier than a can of) and his dim bulb neo-con advisors for steering his campaign into the ditch long about Memorial Day. Despite his temporary flash of brilliance in selecting the hottie running mate, it's generally a good thing that this check pants wearing Republican went down to such ignominious defeat. Republicans have always been better as an opposition party anyway. So, know your strength.

Liberals, as they always do, will take this election as a signal to implement their radical agenda and they will overreach. Pride goes before the fall, as the old saying goes. And libs have more than their fair share of that. They inherited it from their daddy, who got tossed out of heaven by St. Michael with a gaggle of his cohorts because of it.

This is what happens when you allow idiots to choose their own leaders. The American people don't want a president. They want a daddy who will tuck them in at night and hug them and tell them everything is going to be ok. Someday, they will want a dictator, and they will get one. Whether he (or she) is a Republican or Democrat, I can't say. But they'll get one. Plato pointed out over 2,000 years ago that democracy inevitably leads to tyranny. If a buggering pagan can see that, why can't the denizens of our enlightened age see it? Voting leads to tyranny. Which means by voting, you contribute to the inevitable collapse of our society. Stop your internal dialogue. That's logic, a subject with which I am somewhat familiar. So, don't argue.

And what of our beloved Catholic Church? For some reason, the US bishops have chosen to throw in with the Republicans the past few elections. If history is any indicator, when the Church decides to align herself with a certain ruling class or ideology, the result rarely redounds to her benefit. Or to put it another way (as Batman might say), "When you dance with the devil in the pale moonlight, you don't change the devil. The devil changes you." When it comes to the sweaty midnight grope fest on the veranda between the USCCB and the Republican party, chances are good that no one wearing purple is going to look better after the encounter.

Finally the biggest winner (aside from the pinko and his baby-butchering Hollywood homo hordes) is Canada. That's right. Our home and native land as it were. The result allows our Canadian brethren to feel better about their own nation. Sure, we have it bad up here in the True North, strong and free, they'll think to themselves. But look what those chuckle heads just elected. Then they'll point and laugh and swill some more beer. And Canadian self-esteem rises precipitously. (The Canadian dollar, however....not so much.)

Now. I'm dead again. Until the next time the hoi-polloi do something incredibly stupid which requires my prescient analysis. [And I still need prayer which, might I remind you, is your obligation as a Christian. So get to it.]

Oh, and the Oakland Athletics still suck.